A Quickie: What Happened??


As I’ve stated before, I LOVE Music.

And videos are one of the most classic examples of an art form inspired by music.

But only when they tell a story that goes along with the song.

Like Congratulations by Vesta (RIP).

She’s singing about hearing from a nosy, gossiping friend that her ex-man is getting married TODAY!

“Bitch run to the church so you can stop that shit!” – Nosy, Gossiping Friend (probably named Brenda. You know Brenda knows everything)

So Vesta runs as fast as she can, her soccer ball titties jumping up and punching her in the face with each stride, and as soon as she throws open the chapel doors, and begins to speak, some other chick turns around and shushes her from the pews.

Shhh! Quiet, late bitch!

Since Vesta is a little woozy from the constant hits to the face from her Mike Tyson cleavage during the run, she begins to imagine herself as the bride.


She sings at the top of her lungs outside of the church until finally snapping back to reality to Congratulate him before she slithers off to the Sizzler to have dinner with Brenda and their gay friend Monty.

See, THAT’S a video. It has everything: Conflict, Pain, Shattered Dreams and finally, Acceptance.

And, Vesta used to sing her face off!

Nowadays videos don’t tell stories anymore. Even the good songs.

A few months ago I heard Tamar Braxton’s Love & War for the first time on the radio while riding around in Jacksonville, FL. The song was on but I wasn’t really paying attention to it. After I heard it a few more times it began to grow on me. Plus, I like Tamar.

She’s crazy as cat shit, but I fucks with her.

Fast Forward to yesterday:

Love & War had been stuck in my head all day, with me singing the first part of the chorus every now and then because I don’t know any of the other words except “love” and “war”. As my day continued I wasn’t able to release myself from the song’s clutches so I turned to YouTube to give me that fix I needed so I could go on with the rest of my damn day. While watching the video I saw Tamar, looking somewhat like the sistah she is in opposition to the halogen bulb she portrays on Braxton Family Values. Then I noticed the brotha portraying her love interest.

He’s a tall, fit, chocolate brotha whose face we never really see. But one thing’s for certain, he ain’t Vince.

As I continued to watch the video I realized, this some bullshit.

That ain’t your man! Why not put Vince in the video?

Then I said to myself ‘I wanna see a video with regular people in it. With all of their imperfections and rolls jiggling in front of the camera.’

I want that REAL love. That ‘He just left, these kids won’t shut the fuck up and they about to cut my lights off’ kind of love story.

I don’t want pretty bitches having breakdowns on the beach and sexy shirtless dudes promising that the dick will be so magical it will turn your pussy into melted butter and slide right onto the floor.

Or songs about becoming a paraplegic after receiving the fucking of your life.

Videos just aren’t the same anymore. The artists are so enamored with which camera angle best suits them, and how good they look while paired with an absurdly attractive human being that none of us in real life will ever be able to get.

For example, Right Thru Me by Nicki Minaj featured a man that I would indenture myself to if he even vaguely hinted that I could get a mercy fuck.

This Guy.


And then there are shots of Nicki’s Gigantor ass cakes and a whole lot of bad acting and terrible chemistry. I didn’t buy them as a couple because dude is prettier than she is. And Nicki looks like she’s into dudes who have missing teeth that will grip her up and throw her against the walls a few times before making sweet love to her.

Music videos have always been the personification of an artists soul and message. And they’ve always been cool to watch. But now it seems like videos are primarily a tool artists use to make sure that everyone else knows how cool and beautiful they are and only cool and beautiful things exist in their world. Which we all know is bullshit. Because as humans none of us are always poised, pretty and proper. We have our faults and we have our moments of insecurity. One of the main reasons why I used Vesta as my example is because the whole song paints a valuable lesson of lost love and acceptance. I’ve yet to experience that and hopefully I never will. But if I do I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be cool and beautiful through that shit.

Then you have Tamar who is saying that love isn’t pretty, yet she looks pretty during the whole damn video.

If you’re talking about going through the war of love, and you insist on keeping it pretty, I want you to look like this in the damn video. Not like this.


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