Monifah Vs. The Criminal

Monifah Cater, star of TV One’s reality drama R&B Diva’s, recently wed her long-time girlfriend Terez in a beautiful ceremony that took place in Hawaii back in February. However, the pictures are just surfacing now to coincide with the show’s upcoming season finale.

Personally, I think the pictures are beautiful because I’m all for love. I hope love comes and finds me once again and then I can flood people’s timelines with pics of me and my future husband taking shots at a beach bar in Barcelona.

Then again, maybe not.

Because the amount of backlash from their wedding photo has been so infuriating that it makes me sad to think of what types of comments I’d receive from so called social media “friends” about a photo that represents one of the happiest days of my life.

But until my backlash comes let’s read some of the comments that Monifah and Terez received throughout the interwebs.

Here’s a comment from an article in Essence magazine:

This is so sad to me. We grieve God’s heart daily by choosing our lustful desires over him. Marriage is between a man and a woman period. I didn’t say that….God did! Homosexuality is just ONE of MANY sins that humanity partakes in everyday.

Here are a few comments I came across on Facebook:

my people need to wake up and Must realize is a war goin on for your brain & soul..obama is now punishing africa for not accepting this demonic crap!!!

I see her daughter is not there! She stood her grounds! Is this what women are doing by experiencing hurt from men! I’m still praying that jesus will bring her back from this homosexual lifestyle!

And of course my all time favorite, “God made Adam and Eve, Not Adam and Steve“.

Sure, everyone is entitled to their opinions. But being judgmental is different. Passing judgment makes you miss the bigger picture.

And speaking of pictures, have you seen this one?

10440624_10152372444217039_4990435009867000629_nYes, I know. This dude is gorgeous.

And a criminal.

Jeremy Meeks, the gun runner with piercing blue eyes and model features, has sent the Internet into dehydration from the amount of thirst he’s received since his arrest on Wednesday. Comments for his impromptu photo session in front of the jail house paparazzi include:

How is it possible that a man that stunning wasn’t discovered by a modeling agency before he began his life of crime? He seriously could have been a superstar. I suppose there’s still a chance he could be one.

He really is spectacularly gorgeous. I think it’d be great if someone like Marc Jacobs or Christopher Bailey got him out of jail, removed the tear tatt and sent him down the runway. You have no idea what kind of childhood he had and it would be great to see him turn his life around, given the chance.

Millions of people have liked Jeremy’s photo and commented about how hot he is and how he should be a model. Yet nobody seems to give a shit that this mutha fucka just got booked on five felony weapons charges.

Because him so pwitty.

So basically, what the hype surrounding these two photos states to me is that our society is ridiculously superficial. In the first example you have two people, not just two women, but two people that love and care for each other. They have committed no crime other than living their lives but will be condemned based on their sexuality alone. Then on the flip side you have the beautiful criminal who contributes to the rampant gun violence which permeates our society being called ‘Hot’ and ‘Sexy’ and hoping that he has an opportunity to ‘turn his life around’.

If he looked like Flavor Flav there would be more ‘Lock His Ass Up!’ and much less ‘Lock MY Ass Up Next To Him!!!’

HT_rolling_stone_cover_Dzhokhar_Tsarnaev_large_thg_130717_5x7_608It’s reminiscent of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, the Boston Bomber who sent hearts fluttering with his Rolling Stone cover. It didn’t matter that his antics had killed three people and injured hundreds. He’s nice to look at so his humanity gets brought to the surface because people look at him and wonder ‘How can anyone that attractive be so troubled?’ But the reality is that he is troubled. Because normal hot people don’t plant bombs.

He’s a criminal.

Just like Jeremy Meeks.

And Monifah is just a person who chose to share pictures of her wedding day only to be condemned to hell for her sexuality.

Some may look to their own upbringing and never understand my position, but respect it and move on. Some will turn their noses up at anything I have to say and judge me regardless of anything that might make sense to them because they’re judgmental. And then there are those who will completely disagree, quote the Bible and say something idiotic like ‘Ben you’ll be sitting right next to those lesbians at their reception in Hell!’ because they’re homophobic.

And please understand I know the difference between being homophobic and being judgmental. Just because you may not understand or agree with homosexuality doesn’t make you a homophobe. Calling me a faggot, questioning my masculinity, condemning me to hell and using your own religious beliefs to disagree with and discount me as a human being makes you a homophobe.

And an asshole.

Now, not everyone found Monifah and Terez’s wedding photo offensive or detrimental to the sanctity of marriage. And not everyone found their underwear swimming in a pool of moisture around their ankles after seeing Jeremy Meeks’ photo. But still, enough people commented with some of the most ignorant things I’ve ever seen so I had to write something.

Our society is so fucked up. I know I’ve said it before and I will say it again. Why, in this day and age, should we give two shits about two women getting married or a hot criminal? Monifah and Terez aren’t the first lesbians on our planet and Jeremy Meeks isn’t the best looking criminal in prison (and No, I don’t want to find out who is. That’s a contest they can keep to themselves). Sometimes I wish we gave a shit about things that matter more so than things that don’t.

OH, and by the way, all of you people who believe in the ‘sanctity of marriage’ and all that need to realize one thing;

Kim and Kanye are married now and NOBODY said BOO! about that shit.

If you really need to ban someone’s marriage it’s theirs and nobody else’s.




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