Relationships are hard work.
In order for them to be successful couples need to take into consideration each others feelings, likes, dislikes and triggers. There should be honesty and communication. Laughter and fights. Passion and building.
It’s a partnership and should be treated like something you want to invest in.
But overall the one thing it needs the most for success is anonymity.
Everyone does not need to know your business. And honestly, nobody really needs to know you’re in a relationship if it doesn’t pertain to them.
This is why I find myself cringing at social media sometimes because of people’s readiness to throw their relationships in our faces all the time. And don’t get me wrong, I love love. I believe it is the key to living a fulfilled life whether it’s being loved by someone or having a love or passion for a particular thing.
We all need love.
What we all don’t need is to be reminded of the things that take place in your relationship because, to me, that’s not love.
And in this day and age the thirst is real.
But what can you expect when we live in a society that readily gives into its own desire to share every piece of information with anyone who is willing to listen?
When social media is involved relationships fall into one of the four following categories;
Barack and Michelle
They are always down for one another, and in their photos they prove that with huge smiles and embraces. Yet, they’re not inundating timelines with their pictures every time they post something.
Apart they exude confidence but when they’re together there’s tenderness, love and support. They don’t air their dirty laundry out on social media because their relationship is theirs and theirs alone. Many may talk and whisper about what’s going on between them, but all of it is mere speculation. The only two people who know what goes on in their relationship is them and that’s the way they like it.
Jay and Bey
This couple adores the spotlight almost as much as they adore each other. The good times of their relationship will find its way into our timelines via pictures, stats or tweets.
Even when there appears to be a bit of drama surrounding them they face the crisis together, shut all their haters down and move forward united like Voltron.
Unlike Barack and Michelle, they’re not afraid to appear imperfect but like Barack and Michelle they don’t give away all of their mystique for attention.
Kim and Kanye
Though I have the sad distinction of sharing my beloved birthday with these two assholes’ anniversary, they clearly have something going on.
Because they’re both narcissists who are in love with each other. Social media is their world to praise each other, as much as themselves, all the time. Many watching wonder ‘Why the fuck are they together?’ because at first it seems so mismatched. However, when you really think about what it takes at their core to be the type of people that they are it makes perfect sense for them to be together.
And our adulation is their fuel.
For example, think of that one friend you have online who on occasion will post something like “I think I’m going to delete my account for a while” and people rush to their aid with comments like “No, don’t leave!” “We’ll miss you. STAY!”
My response is usually just as supportive.
This couple is only as powerful as we make them, and since they love themselves almost as much as they love each other, they will constantly be the reigning social media couple because attention is like air to them.
This is the messiest of the messy. They post EVERYTHING and it gets downright dirty.
Name calling. Dry shade thrown through pics and quotes. Then, out of nowhere, the back and forth arguing.
And for the grand finale, the ‘Damn, what do you do when you still thinking about someone??’ message, which is their subtle, yet infantile, way of letting the other person know they’re sorry.
These are the thirstiest of the thirsty. Because honestly, if you really had something to say to someone, instead of posting a tweet or a stat from your phone why not just CALL them? Because that is also an option since the device you use to take photos, upload pics and update your stats with is, at its base, a tool people have been using for over a hundred years to speak to someone directly.
It’s a phone, so why not call?
Because all of that unnecessary drama is for everyone else except the people involved in it. And if social media has taught us anything it’s to never miss the opportunity to turn a small thing into a huge ‘LOOK AT ME!’ moment.
So if you’re in this kind of relationship you’re pretty much fucked until you realize the shit’s tired and corny.
Ultimately social media is a powerful tool for networking, brand building and staying connected with family and friends all over the world. But in the wrong hands it turns into that individual’s personal reality TV show.
And some things should still remain private.