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When I sit and think about where I was five years ago it makes me wonder. At 30 years old I had just snuck back into Philly after completing a fabulous FREE trip around the world. 261_18169407445_6698_nI was about ten lbs skinnier, I had cornrows and a strange mountain man goatee. But inside I had become different. All of the things I’d seen contributed to a whole new outlook on life. At my core I knew I was the same man I had always been. But many of the ideals I had adopted throughout my life were tested during my international journey. Things I felt so strongly about became things that I knew I would never view the same again. Things I never had any interest in became sources of thoughtful conversation with new acquaintances and friends. I found beauty in different sources. I listened to music differently. I was receptive to embracing change and accepted it wholeheartedly. I 100% submitted myself to the process and enjoyed every minute of it. But what I enjoyed the most was knowing that the foundation I already had would only get better as I got older.

1005674_10151793428082446_403299960_nFast forward to right now. I’m sitting in an office chair here at my daytime headquarters in Corporate America. I’m about to celebrate my four year anniversary with this job and every time I think about the fact that I’ve been at the same gig for four years it trips me out. There was a time in my life not too long ago where I had gone through three different jobs in a four year period. Of course, during that time I was living in my parents house and barely making enough money to even be considered poor.

If you figure that I’m in a much better position in life at 35 than I was when I first got back home at 30 then you have to agree that I’m in a way better position now than I was at 25 when I first got out of college. (Shut up. I was on the Super Duper Senior Program. Think Ice Cube in Higher Learning. I was plotting on stealing all the knowledge mu’fucka)

We live our lives in stages. At one point you could be living the single life without a care in the world and a few years later you’re happily married with a child or two. You could be working at the shittiest job known to man one year and be swimming in money like Scrooge McDuck a year later.

Everything changes. That is the one thing in life that you cannot stop.  My father taught me years ago that in order to move forward in your life things must change. If you want to be healthier you must exercise and eat better. If you want to get your degree or certification in any field you must sign up for the courses. Hell, if you want to ask the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen out on a date you must approach them.
They may turn you down flat but at least you overcame the fear you had of either succeeding or failing at that task. If anything it will only make you less hesitant to approach the second most beautiful person you’ve ever seen.

One of the reasons why we never change is because we’re scared of what we may lose. But we never think about all that we’ll gain. Some people apply change to their lives once, fail miserably, and then chalk it up to experience for the rest of their lives. They never try again and grow bitter as they watch others around them accomplish feats that they themselves can only dream of.

To be honest, for years I have been that individual. Reading people’s books and thinking to myself ‘I write better than this shit!’ Watching people’s videos and thinking ‘What the fuck is this mess?’. The problem with hating from the sidelines is that all it does is solidify your position on the sidelines. 

Sometimes for the rest of your life.

So grab some poms poms, a tight sweater and a short skirt bitch because you’re going to be the eternal cheerleader of Hate,Hate,Hate. All that hate might make you funny to people who are hating with you, but the successful people can’t hear you because it’s all whispers and whines to them.

In life we’re faced with two choices; We either try or we don’t. It’s as simple as that. If we try and fail, we try again or we don’t even bother. Now, I’m not saying if you have a heart condition and you’ve always wanted to get on a roller coaster go ahead and do it. That would be a suicide mission. There are certain attainable goals in our lives that we never invest the time in even though we know we would be successful.

And that’s what it all truly boils down to. A fear of being successful. Because with success comes the responsibility to produce more success and how can that even be a guarantee?

But think of what you’ve already accomplished in your life. The milestones. The triumphs. The accomplishments that you’ve made up until this point only prove that you can do whatever you put your mind to. And that’s no bullshit. Because I know people who have overcome insurmountable odds to achieve their success and what made them successful is no different than what’s inside all of us.

The only way that things will ever change in our lives is if we change them ourselves. Complaining is annoying. A dream without a plan is just a wish so get focused and get it done! Nobody can change your life but you.

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